Teething and the Pre-Menstrual Syndrome Infant (HoL 16)

I woke up this morning to Isaac screaming. A baby can’t fine tune the urgency in their cries very well, so the “I dropped my pacifier cry” is roughly the same intensity as the “Gang of Bikers are Setting Fire to the House” cry.

I assessed the situation. 1) It’s still dark: not time for me to get up yet. 2) Baby is crying: Somebody should probably do something about that. 3) Nancy is not in bed: She is already awake. Situation is normal.

Then I realized 2 + 3 should equal quiet baby. Nancy might already be in the shower, which means she doesn’t hear the baby. It was time to spring into action. I tried to fall back asleep, but the baby kept crying. As a few more neurons woke up, I realized that the shower wasn’t running.

It wasn’t 5:00, Nancy’s normal wake up time…..it was about 1:40. I got into the nursery where Nancy was trying to calm the boy down. Nancy is the nurturer, I’m the fixer. 2:00 in the morning is not time to think, it’s time to act!!!!

I changed the boy, and he calmed down somewhat until I put him back in the crib, when he exploded with wailing again. My mind panicked. I felt like a complete failure. He was supposed to be done with this crying in the middle of the night. He sleeps almost the whole night through, and usually if he wakes up, popping a pacifier into his “cry hole” will put him right back to sleep. I was frantic, I thought this couldn’t be the same little baby who hours before was snuggling peacefully with me while we watched a documentary about a guy who got eaten by a grizzly bear.

I had to just walk away. I needed to calm down. Nancy went back into the room to settle him down, which lasted about ten minutes before another eruption. I fed and rocked him for quite a while until he settled down. I don’t know what time I got back to bed.

As part of Nancy’s normal routine, she puts Isaac into bed with me for the last 45 minutes of my normal sleep time. He usually cuddles up and sleeps the rest of the morning. Not this morning. As soon as she put him down, he started screaming on full blast right in my ear. This is not a good way to wake up.

I finally got him settled back down and sleeping. It seemed that I would get a little peace and quiet this morning. As soon as he fell asleep, I started to drift off as well. Nancy came back into the room, climbed onto the bed, kissed us goodbye, and started the Great American Scream machine back on high.

I had little sleep, had been woken up by a screaming baby twice in one morning, an hour before I normally get up. Today sucked. Not only did it suck because I felt crappy, and the baby felt crappy, but being a liberal, I managed to find a way to feel guilty about feeling miserable as well, thinking of all the other people with real problems.

We think this is all due to teething which is Nature’s way of lulling you into a false sense of security that maybe you have things under control in the parenting department only to pull the rug out from under you and laugh when you fall on your spine.

And another thing. Men, brace yourselves….Nancy is in “Company Mode” as well. Women deny that “Company Mode” exists, but men know exactly what I’m talking about. Things are getting cleaned at my house that haven’t been out of the box since we got them as wedding gifts. Every waking moment is spent doing some chore (i.e. sweeping, vacuuming, running to the grocery store) which will be done three more times between now and the day company arrives on Friday.

I’m tired, got a grumpy baby, and a wife that has vacuumed and Febreezed every seat cushion in the house twice.

We are having all these folks in town on a count of Isaac’s dedication at the church. If you are in the area on Sunday, Feb 5th, please stop by College Park Church across from U.N.C.G. at 11:00 and join the celebration. Stay for lunch and the “Male bake-off” after church as well.

Strength and Honor


Big Matt