Easter PIctures

Here are some pictures from Easter Day.

Isaac had a special snack this afternoon he made himself.

Matt

Two Can Be as Bad as One (HOL 78)

House of Laughter 78

Nancy has a new pat answer for whenever she is asked “How’s Isaac?”

“He’s Two”.

For those unfamiliar with two year olds, this means that within a five minute span, a child could ask for a cheese sandwich, upon receiving the cheese sandwich cry because he wants a pancake, when the sandwich is removed from the table, cry because he wants the cheese sandwich, and throughout the ordeal ask for a cookie every 20 seconds. When you explain “If you eat your sandwich, you can have a cookie”, there are equal chances that the child will flop on the floor sobbing uncontrollably and that he will quietly and happily consume the sandwich.

Every waking moment is a crapshoot of emotion.

Friday morning, Isaac and I bummed around the house playing with cars, construction toys, and watching movies. After watching the Pee Wee’s playhouse DVD again, I asked, “What else do you want to watch?” I was expecting him to suggest favorites such as “Spiderman” or “Chewbacca Movie”.

The movie he wanted to see? “I wanna watch Hairspray.” Well, at least we won’t have to change churches.

After Nancy came home, we walked to the theater to see “Horton Hears a Who.” During the previews, Nancy and I got a quick glimpse into what will be the dominant fashion/ decorating trend in our home for late 2008/ 2009. It turns out there is going to be a Speed Racer movie coming out later this year. It is brightly colored, loud, fast paced, features dozens of race cars, and I have never seen Isaac focus on something so intently for the two minutes that the preview lasted.

Horton was a decent kids movie. It was impressive visually, and the humor was really sharp. It also had a great message for kids. Isaac explained to me who the good guys and bad guys were through most of the movie. He wasn’t a big fan of Vlad the Vulture.

This morning, Isaac and I went and visited our friend Ed Smithey who had to work this weekend. Lucky for us, he is a fireman and Isaac and I went to the station to look at the trucks. Isaac and I dressed Blackie Bear up in his fireman outfit and brought him with us. All of the firemen were very nice to Isaac, and Isaac was more than happy to show his bear to all of them.

Happy Easter! I will post some pictures later in our Easter clothes in front of our church’s annual “Flowering Cross” We plan to spend the rest of the day in a sugar coma watching Peter Parker fight and sing with Tracey Turnblad thanks to the Easter Bunny.

Strength and Honor,
Matt

Isaac's first Jackass video

The other morning, Isaac came into the kitchen to show me his new trick. Coffee exited my nose. Also, there is one more cool picture I couldn't fit on my last post.

Strength and Honor

Big Matt

Building Blackie (HOL 77)

House of Laughter 77

A couple of weeks ago, my parents flew up from Florida to spend some time with Isaac. Mom had recently bought Isaac’s cousins Eli and Lily each a “Build a Bear”. She wanted to get one for Isaac as well.

I should clarify. You don’t just go to the “Build-A-Bear Workshop” and buy a stuffed animal. No, you buy the skin, pick out a small satin heart to put inside the skin, pick out a “voice” for your new pet, help fill it with stuffing, “fluff it”, and then register your new animal at a computer in the store. (With all other toys, most of these steps are performed by children in Chinese sweatshops.)

When you first arrive at the store, there are two dozen bins filled with a rotating variety of different animal pelts. There are mostly bears, but the occasional beaver, dinosaur, or tiger are thrown in to the mix for diversity’s sake. The first bear Isaac picked was a hideous white bear covered with Kelly green shamrocks. No amount of persuasion seemed to change his mind about it. This was the bear he wanted: the one that no doubt would be marked down 75% on March 18th.

Thankfully my Dad found a handsome black bear for Isaac, and Nancy discreetly put Bono bearskin back into the proper bin. Mom wanted a recording of she and Dad saying, “We Love You Isaac”, but Isaac preferred the vicious growl recording instead. Isaac stuffed and fluffed his bear.

End of story right? Not quite. You see, you have to buy the bear an outfit and accessories. There were several hundred different choices for Isaac’s new ursine friend’s wardrobe. There were also dozens of accessories like cell phones, sunglasses, and jewelry. Dad and I were extremely helpful offering Isaac the “Bear Wheelchair” and Pink “Hannah Montana” Panties. What really blew my mind was that there are hundreds of these stores across the country. Stores that over 70% of their merchandise is clothing for stuffed animals. Not only that, but the place was packed! There was a birthday party with a dozen kids in the back room, and each child had their own critter!

Isaac was going into sensory overload. He wasn’t interested in the Carolina Panthers outfit or the Spiderman outfit. (They also had a well stocked “Charlotte Bobcats” outfit.) We settled on a Fireman outfit that the bear has worn twice now.

Registering the bear was only slightly simpler than applying for financial aid. We had to choose a name right then, which is a lot of pressure for a little guy who is out past his bed time, and has spent the last hour building a bear. In honor of my grandmother’s memory, I suggested the name “Schvatza”. Isaac picked the name “Blackie” instead.

“Blackie” is now the number one stuffed animal at our house. His growler box died after two weeks, but he is still Isaac’s favorite. When Isaac is really mad or pouting, I will hold Blackie up to my ear like he is whispering and then tell Isaac, “Blackie bear asked why you are sad.”
He will usually talk to the bear when he won’t talk to Nancy or I.

Strength and Honor
Big Matt

Librarian Mother...Who would have thought? (HOL 76)

House of Laughter 76

Isaac cycles through certain books obsessively. He will happily listen to you read them three or four times consecutively.

The number one book right now is “Going on a Bear Hunt”. I remember my pre-school teachers leading the class on “Bear Hunts” when I was a child. The premise is that “We are going on a bear hunt. We are going to catch a big one. What a beautiful day. We’re not scared.”

The group then encounters a series of obstacles that can’t be gone over or under, eventually ending up at a bear’s cave. Upon finding the bear, they run back home with the bear chasing closely behind.

I love this book for two reasons. 1) I only have to say the first word of every sentence. Isaac “reads” the rest of the book to me. 2) Every single damn time I read the book, Isaac has a gleeful look of anticipation as the family approaches the bear’s cave. When I read the part about “Two big furry ears….One shiny black nose….Two Big Googly eyes….It’s a Bear!” He looks at me like I am about to tell the funniest joke in the whole world and he is just dying to hear the punch line.

Isaac’s enthusiasm for “The Marvel Comics Guide to the Incredible Hulk Universe” is thankfully ebbing somewhat. The Guide is a large colorful directory of every hero and villain associated with Dr. Bruce Banner and The Incredible Hulk since he was first exposed to gamma radiation. Isaac routinely identifies each character as a “Good Guy” or “Bad Guy”. Isaac and I have gotten into intense debates over whether or not the Hulk is a “Good Guy” (my stance), or a “Bad Guy” (Isaac’s position). After reading the history of the Russian equivalent of the Fantastic Four that the Hulk battled in the early 80’s for the sixth time in a week, I realize why girls didn’t like me in middle school.

The only real plus to the book is that Stan Lee never created a female superhero who’s secret weakness was gravity.

Isaac’s most intense obsession is over a book my mother gave me for Valentine’s Day when I was a child. “The Wookie Story Book” tells the story of Chewbacca’s family. For being set on a distant planet inhabited with strange life forms, it is one dull read. The upshot of the story is that Chewie’s son Lumpy wanders away from his family’s tree house to find some berries in the dangerous swamp below. He gets lost, Chewbacca rescues him, and then they have a big Wookie party.

When my folks were visiting a couple of weeks ago, my dad started off reading the actual text in the book, and then deviated in to his own version of the story. My father’s version was much funnier, and featured many more hysterical bodily functions then the original. Since then, I’ve never read that book the same way twice. One night, the story will be about Chewie’s son learning to use the potty, the next night it will be about Momma Chewbacca buying Daddy Chewbacca a Wii.

My mom told me that when I was Isaac’s age, I was obsessed with Dr. Seuss’s “The Foot Book”. I recently bought a copy for Isaac. Inspired by a photoshop of the book’s cover I had seen on the internet, I changed every repetition of the word “Foot” to another very funny word with the same first and last letter that has to do with a bodily function. Needless to say, Isaac and I could barely finish the book we were laughing so hard.

Up in the Air Feet, Over a Chair Feet
Slow Feet Quick Feet, Here Come Pig Feet
Wet Feet Dry Feet
Up Feet Down Feet, Here Come Clown Feet.

Nancy came in to see what good clean family fun we were having. She warned me yet again, that he would say this hilarious word at day care, and I would be blamed. (I somehow think that anything off color he says in the future will be attributed to me.)
Nancy took the book and tried to read the “Original Version”. She read, “Left Foot, Right Foot, Feet, Feet, Feet.”

Isaac interrupted “NO! Daddy reads this book!”

I love it when my wife wants to give me a disapproving look, but she can’t do it because she is concentrating all of her effort on not laughing.

Strength and Honor
Big Matt